On this episode of Straight Up With Stassi, fairy godmother Lo French joins Stassi to recap Stassi’s girl’s trip to Paris with Katie, Brittany, and Lala.

“I don’t know if I was beheaded, I don’t know if I was a cobbler…”

“My favorite day was Versailles,” Stassi says. “Did I tell you about my last time when I had a tour guide?”

“I don’t think so,” Lo says.

“Last November when I went with Beau I was like, ‘You know what? I’m going to do this right.’ So I got a tour guide just for us two,” Stassi explains. “If you can imagine a woman, I would say early forties or something… actually, she looks like she could either be really young or really old, you have no idea.”

“That’s European,” Lo laughs. “I love it.”

“Anna Maria,” Stassi says. “She doesn’t have TV, her phone is an old iPhone 3, she doesn’t have social media. She’s from Sweden originally but she’s obsessed with Paris and Versailles. I got along with her so well when I went with Beau. She’s a little Versailles genius. The wealth of information and knowledge… I felt like when I introduced my friends to her, they were like, ‘I feel like I’m meeting your family. The way she talks to you and looks at you.’ She was so happy to see me and see my friends.”

“That’s cute,” Lo says.

“So we had a private tour of Versailles and I saw so much more than I’ve ever seen before,” Stassi says.

“So wait, actually walk me through it,” Lo says. “Where do you start? Where do you go? Because I feel like you guys were there all day.”

“When I went with Beau we just did a half day,” Stassi explains. “This time, I was like, ‘I don’t give a fuck if the other girls don’t want to do this, I’m doing a full day. Like, I planned this whole trip, I’m doing a full day.’ Luckily they really wanted to because Brittany is getting married in Versailles, Kentucky at a castle, so she’s like, ‘I want to see the real Versailles!’ So, she wanted to, Lala was into whatever we said, she was easy, smooth sailing, and Katie loves Versailles. So the car picks us up and Anna Maria is there, we’re in a big van. She explains a lot of things before we get there, we get to Versailles, and instead of going in the actual palace first, we started with the immediate outdoor garden area — we started in the Queen’s Garden, went to the King’s Garden, walked a little bit around, and then she goes, ‘I have a present for you, but we have to be careful. So hold on, I need the guards to not see.’ And we’re like, ‘What is she talking about?’ Did you know that Marie Antoinette had a grotto?”

“Yes,” Lo says. “The tour that I went on, they said that only four percent of people who go to Versailles end up going there, but she had it built to look like a peasant French town.”

“I’m not even talking about that, I’m getting to that, this is a secret thing,” Stassi says. “Not a lot of people know about this. I’m going to get to that, I’d never been there either. We went into the bushes and before we got there she’s like, ‘This is my surprise,’ and she took out a bottle of Marie Antoinette rosé wine, and I’m like, ‘Yes! This bitch is sneaking alcohol!’ She’s the most innocent lady in the entire world. She brought us macaroons, we’re walking around and she shows us Marie Antoinette’s grotto. It was like a dugout cave where there were these magnificent statues and sculptures and water around it. There was no one there. When I walk around the gardens, I cry. I can’t help it. I know that I used to live here. I don’t know what the fuck I did, I don’t know if I was beheaded, I don’t know if I was a cobbler, I don’t know if I was a servant, I just know that in another life, I was there. I just feel such an attachment to it.”


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